


Late Night Phone Calls

by Aaronlisa



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-05
Updated: 2012-01-05
Packaged: 2017-10-28 23:18:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/313265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aaronlisa/pseuds/Aaronlisa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>That part is unreachable no matter what she does.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Late Night Phone Calls

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wanderlustlover](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wanderlustlover/gifts).



> Set during Season Four, after Dean came back from Hell.

The phone rings as if on schedule and Jo picks it up without even looking at the display. She mumbles a tired hello into it.

"Hey, did I wake you?"

Jo smirks in the dark, it's three in the morning and Dean is asking her if he's woken her up. He wakes her up almost every single night that he calls her and he always asks if he has. And she always says the same thing.

"Nope," Jo says. "I was just laying here watching some TV."

"Sure you were," Dean says. "I could call back later."

She knows that if she agrees, he won't call her. "It's fine, Dean."

If it wasn't for the fact that she can hear him breathing, she'd think that he had hung up. The line is quiet except for his breathing and Jo shifts in her bed, trying to get comfortable.

"What is it?" Jo sleepily asks.

"I couldn't sleep."

There was a time when she had asked him why he was calling her, why he hadn't just woken up his brother, why he didn't find his way to some all night diner or bar. Now she knows better.

"Bad dreams?"

"More like memories," Dean quietly says.

"Did you want to talk about it?" Jo asks.

She always asks this, hoping that one day he'll give her a different answer.

"Not particularly. How about you tell me about school?"

"Dean," Jo begins but he cuts her off.

"Don't ask twice, Jo."

"Fine," Jo tells him.

She wants to push him into opening up but she knows that forcing him will only push him farther away. Jo sighs but launches into a story about her classes and Dean listens to every word. Every now and then she can hear him taking a sip from a bottle. She can't help but wonder if it's beer or something harder. He might have been released from Hell but she knows that there's a part of him that's still in Hell. That part is unreachable no matter what she does.

Eventually she yawns and looses her focus.

"I should let you go," Dean says.

"Wait," Jo says.

"What is it?"

"Do you ever think about giving it up?"

There's a silence as he processes her words. This is new. Normally when he says he should let her go, Jo gratefully hangs up the phone and falls asleep. She's changed their routine and for a moment she thinks she's ruined everything.

"All of the time, but if I did, who would protect people from the monsters?"

There's no point in telling him that there are other hunters out there. The Winchesters are prickly about their life's work. Jo sighs into the phone, she wishes that he was closer. He needs her but there are far too many miles between them, not to mention Dean's pride.

"Your heart's not in it," Jo quietly says.

"Don't matter," Dean tells her. "It's what I do. And now I've got a lot to atone for."

 _After Hell_ is unspoken but it's heavy in his tone and she knows that no matter what anyone could tell him, all that matters is what Dean believes to be true.

"Dean, I worry about you."

"I'm fine, Jo,"

His voice is tired and rough. It's full of lies but she's afraid if she calls him on it, he'll stop talking to her and he doesn't have very many people to open up to.

"How about you take a break, come visit me?" Jo asks.

"We're too busy for me to take a holiday."

"Can't you find a hunt that'll bring you here then?"

She hates the fact that her voice sounds desperate and needy.

"I can try," Dean tells her.

"You'll call me, right?"

"Yeah, of course."

It's a lie and they both know it. Jo sigh as she stares into the darkness of her room. She should have just stuck to the script. It's what Dean apparently needs from her.

"Dean, I just miss you," Jo says. "I just want to see you."

"I'll try," Dean answers. "Get some sleep."

He hangs up the phone before she can say goodbye and Jo puts her cell phone on the bedside table. She lays awake far longer than she should, especially since she has an early morning class. Her heart hasn't been on school since Bobby had called to tell her that Dean was gone. Every time she looks at a classmate, she can't help but wonder how they can live blissfully unaware of the evil that lurks in every shadow.

When her alarm clock finally goes off, she thinks about cutting class. Maybe she should just drop school and go back to hunting. At least she'd be do something worthwhile with her life. Her phone rings and she answers it.

"I'll call you tonight, if you promise not to do anything stupid."

His voice is even worse for wear and Jo knows that Dean didn't sleep either. She wants to tell him that it's her life and that she should be able to choose what she wants to do with it, whether that's going to school or hunting.

"You're too smart to wind up like me," Dean says.

"You're not stupid," Jo tells him.

"Don't. I'll call you tonight."

"Fine."

She hangs up on him this time. When her classmates ask her if she has a boyfriend, she has no idea how to explain what Dean is. His late night phone calls make it impossible for her to have a boyfriend and even if Dean wasn't calling her, Jo doubts that any of the pretty boys on campus could make her look twice. She wants Dean, has wanted him for a very long time. Yet the timing never seems right. Jo thinks that maybe there's a part of him that wants her to, a part that isn't so intent on protecting her and keeping her safe.

She drags herself out of bed and into the shower, pushing all thoughts of Dean out of her head. Winter break is just around the corner and she thinks that maybe she'll weasel it out of Dean or Sam or even Bobby where the brothers are and she'll make Dean realize that she's capable of saving herself.

((END))


End file.
